8.05.2010

In Praise, Rejoice

It is a mark of the regular state of my mind that I can most see God when it hurts. The glorious desperation of a heart crying out. Oh the dramatic anguish of a dark night of the soul.
But I'm realizing there are certain songs I can't listen to anymore because they encourage me to be sad or angry. I feel more creative when I'm hurting, I have a tendency to milk memories and wounds for more than they are worth for the juices that run out of them (I feel like that analogy went way wrong)
I generally try to be a positive person, and I do well at it when other people are around. Because I want to be ok for them.
But I need to learn to be ok because I'm ok, not because it's what other people want, not because I have this idea of what ok looks like....but because I'm really safe.

Because I want to praise God and rejoice in Him even when things are fine.

I've got scouring the bible in the middle of the night because I can't sleep for hearing the voices of ages ago in my head down pat.
I'm pretty awesome at remembering that God is who is He was before during and after a crisis.
I'm great in the middle of the drama ocean.
It's the fine that keeps my heart distant. It's the fine that keeps me coasting through at the bare minimum level without seeing the joy and majesty of a life well lived in obedience.

I look for the dramatic, the awe inspiring, the double rainbow (I don't even really know what that means but I hear there are federal requirements that state bloggers have to reference it) instead of the every day rejoicing, the every day majesty of a God that is worthy of our praise in everything.

All creatures of our God and King
Lift up your voice and with us sing
Alleluia! Alleluia!

Thou rising moon, in praise rejoice,
Ye lights of evening, find a voice!
Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia!
Alleluia! Alleluia!

Thou rushing wind that art so strong
Ye clouds that sail in Heaven along,
Alleluia! Alleluia!

Thou rising moon, in praise rejoice,
Ye lights of evening, find a voice!
Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia!
Alleluia! Alleluia!

Thou flowing water, pure and clear,
Make music for thy Lord to hear,
Alleluia! Alleluia!

Thou fire so masterful and bright,
That givest man both warmth and light
Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia!
Alleluia! Alleluia!

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