It stresses me out sometimes, but a lot of the time I'm really good in a crisis.
It's the everyday that drives me batty. It's the mundane, the paying of the bills, raking of the leaves, vacuuming, laundry, driving to and from work and making sure I have edible food in my house. I just lose focus, motivation and energy.
I'm working on that and I'm finding it way more challenging than I thought it would be. I'm finding that I'm loathe to ask for help to tell people I'm struggling. I feel like I'm making things way more melodramatic than I need to and that I'm digging my own pit that I'm languishing in.
It's a weird time. A lot of stuff swirling around in my head and my heart. God's been busy pulling back the curtains and shining light in the dusty hidden corners. I have no fear of drowning, it's the breathing that's taking all this work.
Just in case-Jars of Clay Work
I will leave my things packed
So I can run away
I cannot trust these voices
I don't have a line of prospects
That can give some kind of peace
There is nothing left to cling to
That can bring me sweet release
I have no fear of drowning
It's the breathing
That's taking all this work