9.03.2009

Fear

I spend a lot of time afraid. Afraid of killers, afraid of letting people down, afraid of money, time management, conversations, social interactions, anything. I call it worry, concern, ambivilance most of the time but God has realy revealed to me that most of those other words are just nicknames for fear.

I'm afraid of looking silly, afraid of making a mistake, afraid of giving the wrong answer to questions that don't even have right answers. I'm afraid of suceeding and afraid of failing, I'm afraid of committment and I'm afraid of being alone.
I'm afraid to let you know that I'm afraid because I don't want to hear your rational explanations for why I shouldn't be afraid anymore.

My fear is familiar. It's comforting. But it's empty.
I don't want to be afraid anymore.

You came near when I called on you;you said, 'Do not fear!
Lamentations 3:57

The LORD is on my side; I will not fear.What can man do to me?
Psalm 118:6

2 comments:

James said...

Lucado's new book is about these types of fears. I recommend it.

Etepay said...

In speaking through your heart these last few posts, you seem to be speaking directly into my heart.

You're really accomplishing a lot these days. I hope some day I can follow in those footsteps.