9.09.2010

Depression & Sin

The other day my friend Belinda posted a status on FB that ended up being explained with:
She said that depression is just sin that hasn't been confessed. It really offended me. I shouldn't let it bother me. When I met her in college, she was super religious and she still is. I shouldn't be surprised that there has to be a religious reason for depression.
I replied with:
That person is crazy or at least feeding from a crazy tube without taking the time to understand something herself.
There is no actual (and I mean actual as in not twisted and interpreted to please someones opinion) biblical basis for that statement.
As someone that considers themselves religious/Christian/spiritual or whatever the kids are calling following Jesus these days and also someone that has struggled on and off with depression that shit is whack yo!
But I wanted to elaborate a little bit. (And also exhibit how ghettoriffic I am that I can say that shit is whack yo with a completely straight face)

Depression is a crazy thing, not rubber room crazy I mean crazy like unpredictable and barely controllable. I still completely stand by my statement above, that there is no biblical basis for saying depression is simply sin unconfessed.
Can it be? Yes.
Is it always? Absolutely not.

There have been times that I have struggled severely with depression. I've posted before about my struggles in the past about wanting to take my life and being so bogged down in the dark I couldn't see my way out.

The majority of the time that has been because of chemical and hormonal imbalances that required the care of a doctor to fix. Some of this is naturally just the way my brain works and some of it was my doing because of the state of decay I allowed my body to get into. The junk I shoveled into my mouth affects my weight, which affects the way hormones are distributed and how often they are cycled through.
Some of the time has been because of the sin of other people. Sin I took on my own shoulders because I was to young, to inexperienced to know that it wasn't my fault nor was it my responsibility to fix.
However there was some of it, some of it was from my own sin unconfessed.
Before I was saved I didn't pay attention to being outside of God's will, what was His will to me but some bossy list of rules I was restricted by. I'm not really talking about before my falling in love with Jesus here, because who was He to me?
But after I was saved I still sinned, I still struggled and I still withheld my confession from my fellow believers and pretended as if I could keep it from God Himself.

That's not to say that the times I've struggled with depression since I've been saved have all been unconfessed sin, but I remember specific times when I've struggled and knew why and knew what it was I needed to confess and when I did the depression lifted.
But there have also been times, most recently even this past year that I have struggled feeling so heavy, so listless and just.....blank. There have been times that I've been so deep in the dark old habits and thoughts from before that I couldn't see reason that when I adjust my diet, when I exercise, when I track hormone levels that I can level back out again.

I don't think it is or has to be an either or, I think it's both and I think that's ok.
What do you think?

1 comment:

Pete said...

I think someone who thinks that all depression is all unconfessed sins has never had to deal with depression and has never watched anyone go through it. It's an ignorant statement.

I've watched people's lives fall apart all the while praying about the situation and sometimes those prayers lead people to medication to help them.

Chemical inbalance is nothing to mess with, of course neither is unconfessed sins, but I don't think it has to be one or the other, and yet it doesn't have to be just one either. lol.